Meditation | Overwhelm

It’s Monday morning and I’m already in overwhelm. You know the state I’m talking about: you feel overloaded with your life because there is simply too much to do in too little time. Things are actually going well, but with so many things, I don’t have much bandwidth to function, let alone appreciate the wellness of the things.

I now have a new friend at the end of my porch during my meditation time. Her name is Julie and she is a beautiful deer. I believe my guides put her there so I could pet her coat and calm my spirit, before heading off the beach. As a horse, my guide Winslow still makes me a little fearful when I pet him. I walk to the edge of my deck, stroke Julie on her neck once or twice, and Winslow bows down for me to mount him.

My visual connection to JC today isn’t very good. I can barely see him so I try deep breathing a few more times.

JC: What’s going on?

Sally: I’m frazzled. Too much is going on and it is only Monday morning. How can I focus on my work, on “right action?”

I don’t say it aloud but I think I need some concrete advice here. JC is standing still. I can sense he is trying to focus on me and give me his full presence but my spirit isn’t in a place to really accept it.

JC: STOP. GROUND. LET GO. OBSERVE.

My mind stops buzzing at his command. I see an image of myself, taking off my “working pants.” He tells me to breathe deeply. I need to ground. I concentrate on the feelings in my feet and imagine that roots are growing out the bottom of them, into the house and into the grounds of Gentlewood. When I meditate, I lie horizontally so my feet don’t touch the ground and it’s a little awkward to think of my roots growing out and then down.

JC: How do you let go? How can you create more space?

Sally: I practice my “one thing” exercise: If I could change one thing in my life to create more space, what would it be? My schedule. My schedule is controlling me; I’m not in control of it. This is a pattern.

JC: Observe what’s in your life. Not what you are doing. How you are living.

You are in significant transition right now. Let’s consider TRANSITION. What do you see?

Not much! Now I’m caught in a heavy whirlwind filled with papers, a calendar twirls around me. The air is dusty and dirty. I don’t feel safe and my anxiety is pulling up the new roots I’ve just planted.

JC: You are in a tornado. The safest place is in the center, in the eye.

Jesus shifts the powerful currents and now I am in the center of the tornado of my life. I see my company’s legal papers swirling, some bills for my home renovation fly by, I hear people talking on the phone. The awareness grows of just how much I am actually doing from day to day.

JC: These things aren’t happening to you. They are just happening. They just are.

I remember the boundaries class I've taught. Things aren’t negative or positive. I’m “charging” the situation with my own reactivity instead of just responding or adjusting to the situation.

As soon as I make this realization, the tornado disappears and all evidence of my life immediately drops. Silence. I look down and see that I’m standing in the center of a giant paper snowflake of my life.

JC: Observe your life.

I slowly turn around, taking in this snowflake shape around me. This is fascinating. I know exactly what every grouping of paperwork represents. Self-compassion begins to dawn. I’ve got a lot of stuff going on here. I have a new business. I’m renovating a home to create a sanctuary for healing. I get a sense of just how much stuff occupies my life. I really do need more space!

JC: What do you want to connect with? What has heart?

I look at the snowflake of paper around me and something pops up in response—that’s something that has heart! I continue to gaze around and another representative paper pops up. That too has heart.

I understand then that JC is asking me to consider all that’s around me and use my heart as a means to decide what to focus on next. When I feel overwhelmed, I can pause and ask, What has heart? Then I know what action to take.

This experience really puts into perspective what Michael A. Singer wrote in his book, The Untethered Soul: "Eventually you will see that the real cause of problems is not life itself. It’s the commotion the mind makes about life that really causes problems."

What I Learned:

• The busyness of my outside world can crowd out my ability to access my inner world.

• When I feel overwhelmed and want help prioritizing, I need look no further than my heart – it will always point the way.

Reflection Question:

• How do you check-in with your inner world?

• How do you determine what has heart in your life?